Why I don’t want to work 'relentlessly’ as a Somatic Coach

8 years ago on 8th February I worked my last day in Social Care after 16 years of working for some amazing projects and charities across London and Kent. I was leaving to start a new chapter in my life - to teach yoga and mindfulness, coach women and offer Thai Yoga Massage, and to run our yoga and wellness studio - to be fully self-employed.

It’s been a challenging and deeply rewarding journey. These past eight years have been such a busy time for me and I’ve learned so much. I’ve worked a lot - worked with many clients and organisations, and I closed my studio and set up Golden Mandala Yoga-Soma Institute.

Since then I delivered 11 cohorts of trauma-informed yoga teacher training - and many talks, shorter CPD workshops. And I created a new training certification for female practitioners: Trauma-informed Somatic Teacher and Coach for Women - and our Beta cohort just finished their training. Yay!

I supported, mentored and coached many practitioners - coaches, yoga teachers and wellness professionals in building their sustainable and thriving businesses. It’s been such an amazing and extremely humbling time.

As I look to 2024 and how I want to continue my work I know that certain things need to change in order for me to stay healthy and well. My calendar is already full and my year (and half of 2025) is already planned out. As a recovering workaholic I need to be mindful that I don’t jump in and become blind to what my body and my nervous system are showing me.

I’m also aware that my body has been asking for a slower pace and more space and the word that came up for me for 2024 is: Spaciousness.

So when I opened one of the emails in my inbox about how to create a thriving business and the first thing written was about: ‘showing up relentlessly’ I felt a strong body reaction.

I know from experience that our words and the language we use have deep meaning. I also know that my body clearly shows me how I feel about things. So I took some time to pause and listen within to understand this strong somatic reaction.

Here is what I learned as I listened within:

A part of me showed me clearly how tired it is from even thinking about showing up relentlessly. It’s what leads to exhaustion and burnout. I’ve experienced burnout in the past myself and witnessed so many practitioners experience it too.

Feeling of doing anything ‘Relentlessly’ tells me my nervous system is dis-regulated and out of balance. And I’ve learned that everything I do in my life and work needs to be checked against my nervous system state, otherwise I repeat endless burnout cycles. This is also one of the conversations I have with almost every female practitioner I mentor.

As a woman (who is 50) I need to honour my cycles and have the right amount of work and rest/play time.

This is different for each one of us depending on our Life Season and our circumstances - it has to align with your needs and lifestyle.

Showing up relentlessly doesn’t allow me to do work in cycles and in a feminine and self-compassionate way - instead it brings up for me more of masculine ‘keep showing up no-matter-what’ way.

I’ve worked this way for many years in Social Care and at the beginning in my own business, and I learned that working with cycles is much gentler and more sustainable, and allows me to thrive and move forward at my own pace and brings great results.

It allows me to create what I love - not what others say I should work towards. I build my business based on my own definition of success and what fills me up.

I need to have the right systems in place. Having goals, plans and dreams/vision is not enough.

I need to have simple but highly efficient systems to use - daily, weekly and for each cycle or quarter and that takes away overwhelm and the feeling of work/life being relentless.

So as I sense within I feel those clear responses in my whole body - I DON’T WANT TO SHOW UP RELENTLESSLY.

Instead I want to show up as a woman in my work/business - as a somatic coach, trainer and educator - and build my business in a more feminine way - one that is intuitive and collaborative but with compassionate boundaries that take care of me and my clients/trainees.

THIS IS A DIFFERENT WAY OF WORKING - one that I’ve learned over the past few years and one that helped me to build a business I love, in a sustainable and thriving way.

How about you?

As you look at your plans and schedule for 2024 do you feel excited and spacious?

Or do you feel tightening and bracing within your body, wondering how the heck you’re going to do it all?

You don’t have to show up relentlessly to build your business. You can honour your pace and rhythm, and you can enjoy your business and work. Yes, it takes courage, focus and commitment. And usually some support from a mentor - somebody who’s done it themselves.

If you’d like some support - reach out and let’s talk. I offer two business coaching and mentoring programmes: the Embodied Business Mandala™ Group Mentorship and One-to-One Business Coaching Programme. Schedule your free call with me and let’s see how I can support you.